Borderline
by Tunnel-Visionary
Summary: Tired of waiting for House to come around, Cuddy has moved on, and into the arms of an unexpected suitor. The result isn't pleasant for any of them, and dramatic consequences ensue. Rated M for language and possible sexy stuff.
1. I'm Fine

**Borderline**

Chapter One: I'm Fine

Disclaimer: Man I wish Shore would hire me.

It was the moment of truth… Their big secret was about to become an even bigger problem. After months of professional dinners and polite walks home and even more polite walks in, it was finally time to come clean about why they had both been so busy so frequently and so often with each other. She took a deep breath and clenched his hand, looking up at him until his widened eye meet hers.

"It's going to be alright… You know how he is, so we already know what to expect… Don't worry."

"I'm not worried." She sighed, using her free hand to smooth out her skirt. "Its just like you said… I know what to expect, and I know it's not going to be fun."

He audibly sighed at the thought, "Nothing with him is fun."

"Some things are." She smiled, much to his surprise. He turned to give her a curious glance before pulling her towards the door of their friend's house.

She quickly released his hand upon reaching the door, which was met with another curious look before he knocks on the door. "You alright?"

"I'm fine, I just… I'm fine."

The door opened quickly after the resounding thuds of feet and cane came to a stop in front of the other side of the door. The ever-scruffy doctor looked curiously out at his two friends, totally caught off guard by their sudden appearance, together, at his apartment.

"What the hell is this, an intervention? What did I do now?"

"We need to talk, House." He said, casting a comforting glance towards the small woman at his side.

"If you're here to try and talk me out of my 'addiction' again, don't bother. I've been doing a great job keeping my pill popping to a high minimum."

"That's not what we want to talk about." She replied quietly, looking up at him with a hint of nervousness.

"Well then by all means, come on in." He sighed and left the two standing at the door as he made his way back to the couch and continued viewing the movie he had been watching previously. "Wanna beer, Wilson? I'd offer you one Cuddy, but considering your pitiful existence I think you'd try to drink yourself into an oblivion, thusly ridding me of all of my Guinness."

Wilson rolled his eyes and sat across from his friend in the oversized armchair. "House, can you please pause your movie?"

"No, actually. It's on television."

"House…." Cuddy said quietly. "It's important."

He sighed and looked over at her, grabbing the remote and quickly shutting off the TV. "Right… It would have to be if I'm shutting off Pride and Prejudice for you."

"You like Pride and Prejudice?"

"Lisa…" Wilson sighed. Cuddy smiled slightly and wandered over to take a seat beside him in the chair.

"So… you two seem to be pretty tight on whatever issues you want to discuss with me." House rolled his eyes and settled into the couch, glancing over at them. "Go on with it, Kiera Knightly won't wait forever."

"House… We uh… Cud-Lisa and I…"

"We're engaged." Cuddy cut him off quickly, looking over at House nervously, her blue eyes full of anxiety and perhaps even regret. Who's idea had it been to tell House about their relationship anyway?

Wilson too was feeling the pangs of regret when House gave him one of the strangest looks he had ever seen. He couldn't even describe it, a look of… almost, a look of hurt crossed his features.

"Right…" He nodded, quickly turning the TV on again. "Cool."

"Cool?" Cuddy scoffed, almost offended at House's lack of reaction. "Th-that's all you have to say?"

"Um… What do you want me to say?" He glanced her way longingly and momentarily before he let his gaze fall on Wilson. "Congrats? I'm happy for you? Hope the fourth Mrs. Wilson is a keeper?"

"We just wanted you to know because you're our friend, House." Wilson returned House's look with an icy glare. "You don't need to be an asshole."

House shrugged and turned back to the TV. "Well thanks for keeping me up to date, guys. I'm sure that the past few months that you two have surely been fucking like bunnies just slipped on by and that's why you forgot to let me know. Don't worry, I figured it out on my own."

"You… did?" Cuddy breathed, looking down from Wilson to House. "How?"

"Because you're easy to read, Cuddy. And so are you Wilson."

"So… You… Don't have a problem with it?" Wilson also gave Cuddy a look of concern. This wasn't the reaction either of them was expecting. "You aren't going to freak out or feel abandoned or anything?"

"I'm not a child, Wilson." House scoffed. "Plus, it's not any of my business."

"True, but when has that stopped you before?"

"You're right. I obviously just don't care."

"Oh… Ok, um… Do you want us to leave?"

"Stay if you want, Kiera looks way hotter in Pirates of the Caribbean anyway." He sighed and looked over at them again. "Anything else you wanted to discuss?"

"No…" Cuddy sighed, desperately searching for something in his eyes to let her know that he's lying to them, anything that could scream how uncomfortable he is with the idea.

Of course, she wasn't so lucky.

"Alright then." He mumbled quietly and got up to grab himself another drink. "Sure you don't want a beer, Wilson?"

"I'm fine, House, thanks." He also stood and extended his hand to Lisa, "I think we're just going to go."

"Alright, see you guys whenever I roll into work."

"Right…" He nodded, still perplexed by his friend's strange reaction. "See you tomorrow."

"Bye House…" Cuddy sighed quietly as she followed her fiancés lead out of the apartment.

"Night, Cuddy." He looked over his shoulder and gives her a reassuring smirk as she slowly closed the door. After he was certain they were gone, House let himself slide back onto the couch and press his hands to his eyes. "Fuck."

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A/N: So… this probably won't be very long, but I wanted to write it. ...o.0 I have some Hudson issues for sure.


	2. Find it Kinda Funny, Find it Kinda Sad

**Borderline**

Chapter Two: I Find It Kinda Funny, I Find It Kinda Sad

Disclaimer: On second thought, I really hate Shore right now D;

House

What. The. Fuck. Cuddy and Wilson… Are getting married? Who could have foreseen this? Sure, they're both… Jewish… And doctors… But really? It just… It didn't fit. They didn't fit. She doesn't need someone calm, she doesn't need someone eager to please, she definitely doesn't need someone who couldn't stand up to her, which I highly doubt Wilson could. She needs someone more like her, someone who won't take her shit, someone who would make her angry, someone like… Well, not like Wilson.

And what about him? It wasn't as though dating women stronger and more powerful was really a habit for him. Of course there had been Amber, but that was just cause Wilson was trying to date as close to a female version of me that he could get. Cuddy, on the other hand, out ranks him. In most everything. She doesn't need him, she doesn't need his money, she doesn't need his status, she doesn't need any of that. If anything he needs her.

Fuck I'm tired of just sitting around wondering, racking my brain at what to do. I can't just let this happen. I know that damn saying about if you love something set it free, but fuck that. If you love something you go fucking fight for it, you don't just let it slip out of your fingers. That's like… suicide. Kind of. Whatever.

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He spent every waking moment, and truth be told, most moments of his sleep, dwelling on the knowledge that his two best friends were… With each other. Nothing had ever shocked him more, nothing had ever scared him more, and NOTHING had ever hurt him more. She knew how he felt, she had to, it wasn't exactly subtle. And Wilson, God, Wilson of all people, he knew for certain. He knew damn near everything and he still decided to go on and move in on her. Days turned into weeks of him not exactly ignoring but definitely not seeking them out, and he didn't know exactly what he should be feeling about all of that. Finally, much too long after the news had been dropped in his lap, he decided he was going to figure things out for himself.

He snatched up the keys to his motorcycle and sped his way to her house, only vaguely aware that he had forgotten nearly everything back at home, including his cane and license.

But, no matter, he thought as he pulled up in front of Cuddy's house, careful to park his bike somewhere that he wouldn't get ticketed. He quickly limped his way up to the door, only letting the thought of "What if Wilson is over?" flitter through his mind. He was determined, although slightly deterred by a wave of insecurities and worry as he walked up to the door. His first knock was quiet, almost embarrassed, and he summed up the courage to knock again, louder this time.

She opened the door quickly, the bright smile on her face fading quickly upon seeing who stood before her. "Oh…" She sighed slightly and leaned against the doorframe. Her disappointment damn near broke his heart, cause he remembered being the cause of a smile like that. He remembered it, vaguely, and he wished he could still cause it. "Did you need something, House?"

"Yeah, actually." He sighed, pushing his way into the house.

"I didn't invite you in." She growled softly, closing the door behind her nevertheless.

"Nor have you before. Never stopped me."

"I wasn't engaged then."

"About that…" He said quietly, turning to face her. "Don't marry him."

Shock couldn't begin to describe the look that crossed her features. Perhaps because it wasn't… It was everything. Every emotion he could possibly imagine her feeling all jumbled into one big confused look in her pretty blue eyes. "What? Why not?"

"Because-"

"Because you're in love with me?" She snapped, the anger part of the big emotion taking prominence among the other features. She shook her head and pressed her hands to her eyes, "Fuck you, House. Fuck you. Why now? Why the hell would you do this to me now?"

"Because, Cuddy, I-"

"I'm going to marry him, House. I'm going to marry him, because I love him and he loves me. I'm going to marry him because he'd be a good father, he wouldn't hurt me, he won't play games with me."

"You aren't in love with him, Cuddy!"

"What the hell do you know House? You're so wrapped up in yourself you wouldn't have the time or the notion to fall in love with anyone. You don't have the capacity anymore; you filled yourself up with hate. You can't have both."

"It's not hate, I'm bitter, yeah, and I'm angry, but it's not hate."

"You're just scared." She glared, walking past him towards her kitchen. "You're so damn afraid of what this will mean. You're afraid of the change, you're afraid of losing your best friend, you're afraid of losing me, for whatever reason."

"Yes." He said quietly, his eyes following her as she stopped and turned back to him. "Yes I'm scared. I'm scared that I'll never treat either of you the same way… I'm scared that I'll never get to kiss you again. I'm…"

He sighed and turned back towards the door, gripping his leg and heading away from her, "But whatever. If you're going to marry him then you're going to marry him. I can't stop you."

"House," She said quietly, suddenly next to him, a now calm and far less angry hand on his arm. "Why couldn't you have told me? Why didn't you tell me years ago?"

"I took you for granted." House mumbled, turning his downtrodden gaze toward her, genuine remorse hidden in his eyes. "I thought you'd always be here… I just kept waiting for you… to… It doesn't matter. I'm sorry. I do hope you're happy with him."

"No you don't you bastard." She said, tears in her eyes as well as her breaking voice. "You hope for the worst. You don't want it to work cause you want us to yourself."

"I do want you. But you don't want me."

She buried her head in his chest and let her tears fall silently, "You're an ass, House. You're an ass."

"I'm sorry." He pushed her away slowly and reached out for the door, "I'll go."

"I don't-" She stopped herself before she said anything that she regretted. Swallowing hard, she nodded and turned away from him, not quite ready to believe what he was saying to her. "Fine. That's probably best."

House stared at her momentarily, reaching out to turn her towards him, "I'll… I'll see you."

"Right." She nodded, trying her best to avert her eyes to anywhere but his face. Of course, this was impossible, for his stare held and she couldn't help but return his longing look. She knew this was bad, that she was falling for him all over again, but as he leaned in and brushed his lips over hers she found herself not caring because for that moment in time, she was his again. And, though she'd never let him know, when he kissed her he rendered her powerless, she would do anything he wanted just so long as she had a few more seconds with him.

And he'd never tell her, but he knew that. He knew exactly how to get to her, he knew exactly how to get what he wanted, but as he ran his fingers into her hair and pulled her in deeper to him he found himself not wanting to. It was her turn now, she knew what he wanted, and if she wanted the same thing she'd have to let him know.

"I want you." She whispered against his lips, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck.

That was easy. Too easy. Not right. He pulled away from her slowly, placing a last, lingering kiss to her lips.

"No… I… We can't."

"You've already kissed me," She said, grabbing at his coat. "And I've kissed you. I…" She stopped and released him, shocked at both of their actions.

"I'm sorry-"

"I love you." He said as he looked to the floor quickly and backed towards the door. "I'm not running… I'm just letting you figure this out."

And then he was gone, much like last time. And she was still there; standing in her stunned, teary eyed silence with the ball in her court. Now the only thing she needed to know was whose side she was on.

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A/N: Oh House, you evil mastermind, trying to be the good guy to make Cuddy want you more. ;)

Reviews are loved :3


	3. Get Back Up When It Knocks You Down

**Borderline**

Chapter Three: Get Back Up When It Knocks You Down

Disclaimer: Shore and I are still negotiating. Thusly I don't own [H]ouse. -.-

Cuddy

God, what am I going to do? House… Of course he'd do this. Of course he would wait until I had finally moved on to say exactly what I've been waiting for. Maybe… Maybe I should have told him James and I were dating up front, maybe he would have told me then, and I could have… Done something.

I can't just choose now, I love them both. I love them differently, for different reasons. James is everything I need, James is safe, he'll be there. Right? Of course he went through three wives before me, House has never been one to stray… No, House just runs away.

But he wasn't running this time.

James would never run. And he treats me so well.

But there's just something about the way House kisses me…

Damn that man.

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Many Months Ago

"Hey…" Wilson said quietly, slipping into her office in a stealthy manner. He grinned at his gorgeous girlfriend who sat, smiling broadly at his boyishness, behind her desk.

"You need something, Dr. Wilson?" She asked, the smile still tugging at her lips as he made his way over to her desk and settled onto it before her.

"Oh just to let our Dean of Medicine know that she looks absolutely stunning today and that I can't stop thinking about her."

"I'll be sure to relay the message," She chuckled and ran her fingers up his tie, giving it a light tug until he leaned in to kiss her softly, slowly, much like he always did. He was always good at that sort of thing, making even a simple kiss romantic and sweet. It was one of the things she loved about him, and he loved that she loved it.

"Dinner tonight?" He asked quietly, running his hand up her arm until it met her own that had become entangled in his fluffy hair.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world."

He smiled and kissed her again before sliding off of the desk, "I have to get back to work."

"I know you do. I'm paying you."

He smiled and fumbled his way around her office to the door, for he was still always so awestruck by how damn beautiful she was. She just had the ability to make him melt and turn into a clumsy fool with just one look.

"I love you." He said quietly, turning to throw her one last longing look before he left, hoping to get such a reaction as one of her heart melting smiles.

He was met with something even better, a rare blush that graced her cheeks and made her eyes light up. It wasn't often that he was able to get such a reaction out of her, and his smile widened at the sight.

"I love you back." She whispered, dropping her head slightly so that she could return to her work. "Now go on and… work or something."

Yes ma'am."

She smiled again as he wandered back up to his office, glad to have finally found someone that treated her like she was worthwhile.

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Now

"Hey." He said softly, his arms wrapped tightly around her waist as he placed light kisses from her ear and down her neck. "What's wrong, Lisa?"

"I'm just… Thinking."

"Anything you want to talk about?" He propped himself up on his elbow and used his other hand to push the hair out of her face.

She shook all of the thoughts about her previous evening and her encounter with House from her mind and turned to give him a small but happy smile, "No. Nothing. Not right now anyway. I'm just thinking about us… and House."

"That's unsettling." He sighed, lying back down and quickly placing an arm around her protectively. "What about us… and House?"

"He didn't seem off at all to you the other night?"

"When isn't he off, Lisa? He's not exactly the most sane, rational people that we know."

"He wasn't right. He was upset."

"I'm sure he was…" Wilson nodded slowly, looking over at her carefully out of the corner of his eye. "He isn't a fan of change."

"Maybe he is." She sighed, almost inaudibly and to herself.

"What?"

"Nothing." Cuddy smiled up at him again, this one slightly more forced than the last had been. She curled up next to him, pulling the sheets around them tightly as she rested her head on his bare chest. "Forget I even said anything, it isn't important. I was just thinking it was strange."

"Of course." He nodded and ran his hand through her hair absently. It always made him a bit nervous whenever she talked about House. He knew their history. He knew they had chemistry, hell he knew they still probably wanted each other. But he had made the first move, after House failed to do so time and time again. Wilson had just gotten tired of seeing her get reeled in and pushed away just as quickly, he knew it wasn't what she wanted, or what she deserved.

That was why he had asked her out, anyway. Not because he really liked her, at least not at first. He thought she was beautiful, but who in their right mind didn't? House thought she was, and he definitely wasn't in the right state of mind most of the time. First he just wanted to pick her up and dust her off in that good ol' fashioned Wilson way, but as it turned out they had a lot more in common with each other than they initially assumed, and their chemistry wasn't half bad either.

It only took him a few weeks and a few dinners and a few amazing kisses to realize that Lisa Cuddy was very easy to fall in love with.

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A/N: Ugh, sorry for the complete lack of House and the shortness of this chapter. I have a really difficult time writing Cuddy with anyone other than House. I figure: why mess with perfection? ;)


	4. Its Your God Forsaken Right to Feel Love

**Borderline**

Chapter Four: It's Your God Forsaken Right to Feel Love

Disclaimer: Still don't own [H]ouse. -.-

A week after the incident at her place, House walked into Cuddy's office to confront her because he was tired of waiting for her to make the next move.

"Do you even know how to knock? Like, literally?" She asked, tossing her hands in the air. "What if I was in the middle of something important?"

"Are you?"

"…No."

"No problem then." He stood in the entranceway and stared at her awkwardly, not exactly sure how to address the situation that had presented itself. "Have you… thought about what I said?"

"Unfortunately, I think about it all the damn time." She groaned, going back to her work while trying her best to ignore the tension that had very suddenly built up in the room. "Now is not the time or place to discuss it."

"So when will be? I'm pretty positive I lucked out on Wilson not being around the other night, I'd rather not risk it again."

"Right, so, what should we do?"

"You're supposed to answer that." He sighed.

"House, I can't just drop everything for you. I can't do it right now, I can't do it in my everyday life, and I can't just leave everything for you. I have a daughter, a fiancé, a hospital to run and I am sorry that I can't be your babysitter. All right?"

"I don't want you to be my fucking babysitter, Cuddy, I want you to be with me, not with Wilson."

"Again," Cuddy glared, malice dripping from her voice, "we are not going to discuss this right now."

"Well when are we? Tonight? Tomorrow? On your wedding day? When are we going to talk about it?"

"When I figure out what I want!" She yelled, standing up and walking over to him, "And you, sir, Mr. 'I love you, Cuddy', are in no position to rush my deliberation."

He stared at her coldly for a moment before his gaze faltered and fell to the floor, "It's not… complicated, Cuddy. It's a choice. That's all it is."

"You really want to do this right now, House? Cause right now I am not happy, which doesn't put your odds in favor."

"Right. I'll just go… Save lives and wait for you while you continue fucking my best friend. Sounds great."

Settling onto the couch she put her head in her hands and sighed, "God, House, can you for once not make this about you?"

"It IS about me, Cuddy. It's about me, you and Wilson."

"Exactly. It isn't all about you, so deal with the waiting."

He sighed and turned to head back to his office, feeling totally defeated and completely shut down.

"House…" She whispered quietly, looking up at him with eyes that threatened to pour out tears at any minute. He turned to look at her and found he could hardly focus on what she was saying, she was so damn distracting with how beautiful she looked.

"Yeah?"

"We'll talk tonight. I'll come by your place."

House nodded appreciatively, walking over and leaning in to hug her or kiss her cheek awkwardly or… something. She stood to reciprocate the action, getting lost as he confusedly tried to do everything at once, "Gosh, House, you're all nervous or something."

"Oh shut up." He rolled his eyes and kissed her quickly, hugging her around the waist as he did. She, not really knowing what else to do, kissed him back slowly, holding tightly to his arms as she did.

"We need to stop doing that…" She whispered softly as he pulled away from her, eyes still half closed as he looked at her.

"Yeah. Or keep doing it."

"House…" She warned quietly, her breath light against his. His lips ran over hers as he nodded and pulled away again.

"Wouldn't want anyone to see us and talk to our dear friend."

"Another thing," She said a bit more forcefully now that she had gathered her wits again. "Stop with hating Wilson. It's not his fault."

"It is. He knew better. He knew…" House shook his head and limped towards the door. "I'll take on one ass at a time. Right now yours is far more appealing and oh so incredible looking in that skirt."

She shot him a glare, amazed at how he could go from sensitive to antagonizing in such a short span of time. "I'll see you tonight. Don't bother me until then."

"You're no fun anymore. You use to be fun."

"I was fun to you when I was single, House. Now go, I have things to do."

"All right… When will you be by?"

"When I feel like it."

"Oh you're going to surprise me?" He grinned and opened the door, "I love a woman who goes for the element of surprise."

"Go, House. Just go."

"See you later, Cuddy."

"Bye, House."

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Later that Night…

Cuddy arrived on House's doorstep after giving Wilson a few bullshit but iron clad reasons that she couldn't go out and he couldn't come over. She bundled her coat tighter to her as she reached out and knocked on the door, still trying to figure out what she was going to say to House. She didn't have an answer for him, she didn't even have an answer for herself at this point. Loving two people was exceptionally difficult.

He answered quickly, trying his best to look like he hadn't been waiting for her for the past… oh… three hours.

"House…" She said quietly, jumping back slightly at how quickly he had answered. "Hi."

"Cuddy… Hi." Licking his lips softly he moved to the side, allowing her to enter her messy apartment. "Come on in."

"Yeah, of course." Cuddy stepped in nervously and set her bag next to the door. "Look, House, I really don't know what to say… I can't just make a decision like this in the time that you want."

"And while you don't make a decision you continue being with Wilson."

"Yes, of course."

"Sounds like you've made the choice then, Cuddy." He shrugged and turned to head back to his couch where he had nervously been waiting for her. "Sorry I interfered."

"Oh stop it, you big baby." She sighed, wandering over to the other side of the couch and plopping onto it. She pointed at the empty glass and nearly full bottle of scotch on the table, "May I?"

"Knock yourself out." He eyed her carefully as she poured herself a glass and proceeded to drink it. "I thought you didn't like scotch."

"Ugh, I don't." Her grimace and disgusted sound exemplified the pointed as she tipped her head back and finished off the drink. "But I need it."

"Why?"

"Because," She sighed, dropping her head into her hands. "I have the feeling I'm going to do something really stupid."

"This is exciting, will it be a good kind of stupid?"

"Not for me." She turned to give him a sad look before she dropped her head onto his should. "And probably not for you either."

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A/N: . I don't know what she'll do. . I'm sorry.


	5. There's No Time to Shine My Rusty Halo

**Borderline**

Chapter Five: There's No Time to Shine My Rusty Halo

Disclaimer: Still don't own [H]ouse. Shame, really. Also, let me explain this fic a wee bit. It is set in almost an AU, meaning in this fic the better part of season 5 didn't happen. \o/ This is my way of coping with House being a crazy nut job :[

**Months Ago…**

Wilson and Cuddy laughed at something that probably wasn't particularly funny as he walked her up the driveway to her house after their friendly dinner. He stopped short on the last step up to her house and stood awkwardly, not really knowing proper third date etiquette when going on dates with someone like Lisa Cuddy.

"Tonight… was really fun, Lisa." He said, a bright smile still on his face as he ran his hand through his shaggy hair.

"It was." She beamed. She quickly pulled her key from her purse and walked over to the door, wondering how on Earth Wilson had managed to get her on three dates. She never assumed he was… Well, good at this sort of thing. Obviously she was very wrong, judging by the smile on her face as she turned and leaned against the door, "We'll do this again, I hope."

"We can do this any time you want." He laughed, taking the last step onto the small porch. "You know… I have to be honest… When I first asked you out I just… I wanted you to still think you were beautiful and worthwhile, no matter how many times you were let down by other people."

Cuddy stared at him momentarily, her bright smile fading slightly as her eyes dulled. She quickly laughed it off, knowing how Wilson was and not expecting much more than a few friendly dates with him anyway. Her disappointment in him saying this was, however, greater than expected. "I know, James. I know how you are. It's ok, it was nice of you."

"Oh that's- No, what I mean is that was the first time I asked you to have dinner with me but now… I want to have dinner with you… For me as much as you. I don't want to just play the typical Wilson needs needy people, because you're anything but needy and… I like it. I like you." He blushed and looked at the ground, hoping he didn't sound like the idiot he felt. "I like you more than I initially assumed possible."

Cuddy, surprised now, felt her grin slowly creep back onto her face as she leaned into the doorframe, watching him as he made a fool of himself. "James… Thank you for dinner."

She leaned in a pressed a polite kiss on his cheek, her eyes full of that shimmer that they possessed only when she was thoroughly happy. "I'll see you at work."

"Right." He nodded, still feeling obscenely stupid. Had he really just said all that to her? He had. Great. Now she'd never go out with him again.

"Are you busy next Tuesday night?" Cuddy asked, looking over her shoulder with a smirk.

Wilson grinned, thankful that he hadn't ruined everything that he hoped he was building with his friend, "Not anymore."

"Good. You can pick me up at seven."

Then she was gone, smirk still on her face as she slipped into her house, casting him one last smiling look as she did.

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Now…

Cuddy sighed, wrapping her arms around House's middle as she pressed her teary eyes into his shoulder. Her breath was shallow and steady as she tried her hardest not to cry, crying in front of House (again) was the last thing that she wanted to do. She hated being vulnerable to him, because every time she was she ended up doing or saying something stupid.

"Why do you do this, House? Why do you wait until it's… Why couldn't you tell me how you felt before Wilson and I told you about us? Is it like a challenge to you? A game? Cause I don't want to be a game anymore."

"You're not a game…" He said quietly, slowly placing an arm around her and running his fingers into her hair. "I just… I told you. I thought you'd always be there."

"I'll always be here for you. I just… I could have been more. You could have just told me, I… What were you afraid of?"

"I'm afraid it won't work."

"Take chances some times, House." Cuddy sighed quietly and breathed deeply, inhaling his scent while trying to settle her nerves. "I just don't know whether to trust you or not…"

"What are you talking about?" He replied quickly, pulling back to look her in the eyes. "Why don't you trust me?"

"Because, House! You did this to Stacey… She got over you like any sane person would, then proceeded to fall in love with you all over again like… any masochist would. You told her to choose and when she chose you it was like the game was over and the prize wasn't good enough for you so you sent her back. I don't want that to happen. You've toyed with me for too long to do that to me."

"Cuddy." He said, his voice soft as he ran his hands to her cheeks, cupping her face as he spoke to her. "You aren't a game. You're not Stacey, even though she wasn't a game either. I won't run from you Cuddy, I haven't run yet."

She pressed her eyes closed tightly as a single tear escaped her and ran down to his hand, a sob stuck in her throat as her breathing became more rapid the harder she willed herself not to cry.

"You don't love him, Lisa. You love me. If you didn't you wouldn't be here."

"But if I didn't love him I'd have been here a long time ago." She choked on her words, finally unable to keep up her mask of strength. Her tears poured down from her eyes as she pulled herself into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck as she sobbed her bitter and angry frustrations out.

"Cuddy…" He whispered softly, tilting his head and softly kissing her neck, "Cuddy I swear its different this time. Its real, and I'm not going to use you and hang you out to dry."

Cuddy nodded slowly, her tears never ceasing, even as her breathed slowed to almost normal.

"Do you believe me?"

She did. She did and she hated herself for it as she nodded and broke away from her tight hold on him. "Yes. I believe you."

He nodded, his eyes traveling from her lips back up to the glistening orbs of her dark blue eyes, trying his best not to think of himself and what he wanted as he stared at her.

"I… I can't stay, House."

"You can stay for awhile."

"I…" Her breath caught as he softly kissed her, his lips barely against hers, stealing her breath away. "House…"

"Stay for awhile." His voice was soft and muffled against her mouth and his fingers managed to find their way into her hair. She closed her eyes again, slowly this time, as she allowed herself to be pulled back into him with her lips closing over his.

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A/N: Bam. Bet you thought I'd give you some juicy stuff, huh? Maybe I'll go a little R rated in the next chapter… MAYBE. .


	6. Take What’s Yours And Leave The Rest

**Borderline**

Chapter Six: Take What's Yours And Leave The Rest

**Months Ago…**

The first time she invited him she was nervous, almost unwilling. She, of course, liked him, he, obviously, liked her, and they had gotten past the awkward first few dates and moved on to the lingering goodnight kisses dates long ago.

She figured he'd be different if invited in, faster, somehow. But nothing about him changed as he stepped foot in to the dark and orderly house, not his smile, his airy but nervous demeanor. She liked that, the stability he provided in his easygoing, never changing attitude. It made her smile, it almost made her totally happy, and as she pulled him to the couch for cuddles and a terrible late night television movie she could almost forget that twinge on her heart that lead her mind to other places and other faces that his.

As their slow kisses gained heat more than anything, she found that twinge fade away as her heart drummed quicker, willing his slow and loving hands to go faster, grow more intense, to become what she wanted.

And upon realizing that they couldn't, and that they never would become something she wanted, Cuddy stood up and walked back towards her bedroom, motioning for him to follow her, hoping that a night with the handsome and kind doctor would replace any wants of a rugged pain in the ass with bright blue eyes.

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**Now…**

Her hands tangled in his hair as their lips collided and his rough stubble burned at her soft, tear stained skin. This was what she had wanted, what she had waited for and she felt her eyes sting with more tears knowing that this was how it had to be accomplished. Through jealousy and fear, not through the normal ways of falling in love. But, then again, since when had House ever done anything the normal way?

He groaned softly as she slid her hands down the buttons of his shirt, slowly releasing him from it as she kissed him. She pulled the shirt off as he ran his own hands down her slender body, dragging his fingertips over every curve through her layers of clothing before he too discarded her jacket.

"House…" She whispered, hands at the hem of his shirt as he too worked his hand up her back, trying his best to unsnap her damn bra. Those things were always a nuisance; he never understood why any woman would wear them, especially a woman with a perfect set of breasts such as Cuddy.

"Yeah?"

"Go faster." Her breath caught in her throat as his teeth slowly bit down on the soft skin of her neck. His rough chin scratched against her, sending chills down her spine and giving her goose bumps all over her body.

"Not in your life." He scoffed, a smile on his lips as he slipped his hands under her now unclasped bra. No, he wasn't going to go faster. He was going to make her feel it, to feel every piece of him inside her, morals and consequences be damned. She was going to know exactly what he wanted, and exactly how long he planned on keeping her around. She was everything, and so everything was exactly what she was going to get.

"God, Greg, I-" His mouth was against hers as he pulled her on top of him, nudging her into place as she straddled his waist. She groaned and gripped his hair as he pulled her shirt up over her head and tossed it on the coffee table, the cold air hitting her skin forcefully.

"Lisa…" He breathed, his hands sliding up her soft skin and back under her lacy bra. Her groan made him shiver as he massaged her slowly, his lips slowly making their way down her neck to join his very busy hands.

Cuddy's breathing matched her rapid heartbeat as she tore his shirt off and tossed her bra on top of their other discarded clothing. She pressed herself against him and slowly licked his lips as her hands traveled to his belted jeans. "You wanna do this here?"

"Well I can't carry you to the bedroom, so you'd have to get off of me."

"What a shame," She purred, running her fingernails down his chest as she slid off of him, leaving his ever tightening jeans buttoned while she got up.

"Ugh, you need to not be so sexy as you leave me..." House sighed, sitting up and grabbing her by the wrist as she started to walk away. He stood and pulled her too him, holding her tightly against him as he kissed her deeply and pushed her against the edge of the couch. Cuddy gasped as his tongue plowed into her mouth and entangled with hers as his hands went to her skirt, tugging it up and exposing more of her silky thighs.

"I want you… right… now…" He groaned as her hands found their way back to the hem of his jeans. "Right where we stand."

"That's bad for your leg," She mumbled against his lips as her skirt crumpled and his jeans fell to the floor.

"Good for my manhood." He laughed, slipping his hand in the back of her thong.

"I'm good for your manhood." She growled, slowly sliding a knee up his good leg. Grinning against her skin he slowly slid his fingers around and gently started to pull her little panties off.

"I can't disagree."

House found himself frustratingly thwarted as her hand firmly came down on his wrist, putting all hopes he had to see what the lovely, thin garment was concealing on hold.

"But I can," she purred seductively as her tongue slid a slow, torturous trail up his throat.

"I told you…this is bad for your leg. Now," she paused as she hooked a finger into the elastic of his boxers, "I order you to follow me into the bedroom and take me in a way that fully behooves your ever eager manhood." Cuddy illustrated this by slowly backing up in the direction if his room, her finger never leaving his shorts. House was going to have to follow lest he fall and be knocked unconscious and miss it all.

That playful smirk of his was very plain on his face as he slowly walked towards her sexy, slinking form, "Of course, Dr. Cuddy. Tell me how often am I supposed to use this prescription for my….manhood?"

"As needed."

"So once an hour."

She began to grin but stopped short just outside the bedroom, finally coming to terms with what she was doing and was about to do as House nearly fell over her.

"Why'd you stop?" He asked quietly, reaching out and holding her at the waist.

Cuddy looked up at him, a pained look on her face as she was reminded of a boyishly handsome doctor who wasn't into talking dirty. A doctor she was happily enga- well…engaged to.

"What am I doing House?"

He looked at her, tongue running over his lips as he ponders this.

"What you want." He slowly pressed his lips to hers, moving slower again, proving to her in his actions that she wasn't wrong. Or at least… Not lying to herself.

Cuddy groaned as she wrapped her arms around his neck, her sound mixed with disappointment in herself and with pleasure as House slowly slid his hands back into the thin lace around her waist. She kicked off her heels as he lead her back towards his bed, his hands finding their way into places he had only dreamed of seeing again and her hands committing crimes she knew she'd be paying for in a few short hours.

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A/N: So I've told you before I don't write smut well. Guh. I had to call in back up from my smut friends. :[


	7. Took the Good Times, Take the Bad Times

**Borderline**

Chapter Seven: Took the Good Times, Take the Bad Times

**Months Ago…**

He wouldn't ever forget the look on her face when he asked her, holding out a shinning silver ring to her as he got up off of his knees to sit beside her on her couch and slip the band on her finger. The excitement and nervousness in her eyes as she silently shook her head, not really knowing what she could say other than, "Yes."

Now…

The soft acceptance of a proposal that should have never happened kept on uttering itself over and over in the back of her mind as she lay gasping next to the man that had always been first in her life, the one that should have offered her accepted proposal. She groaned softly, hoping he would mistake it as one of pleasure more than one of grief and frustration.

"Are you all right, Cuddy?" His breath was ragged and his leg burned with a pain that he would only allow in circumstances such as the one he was in right now. He reached over to the night stand and grabbed a couple of Vicodin, popping them into his mouth as he turned back to her and wrapped an arm around her slim waist.

"I… I don't know. I don't know what I'm going to tell James, I… God, I feel terrible. How…" tears welled up inside her throat as she turned away from House, her small frame feeling that much smaller against him. "How could I do this to him? How could you do this to him?"

"Cuddy, I- I'm in love with you-"

"So is he!" She cried, sitting up and turning to face him with tears slowly starting to spill over from her intensely blue eyes.

"Not like I am… You know that."

"You don't…" Her knees were drawn up to her chest by this point, and her hair was providing a curtain to shield her face from his pained eyes.

He bit his lip softly and dropped his hands from where they rested on her shoulders, feeling the weight of their actions slowly turning into the weight of consequences. A sigh escaped him as he reached over to her and turned her face softly to look up at him, a softness in his eyes that was very uncommon and hardly recognizable. "Look, Cuddy… I'm… I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm an idiot and I let him get to you before I did. I'm sorry that I never told you how I felt, I'm sorry but there's nothing that I can do to undo what just happened. Just forgive me for ruining what you had because I'm sure it was nice, neat and perfect and everything you want in a relationship. Just go ahead and forget about all this if you want to, but if you don't then tell me, because I want to be with you."

"House, this isn't fair!" She cried, pushing his hands away from her and throwing her legs over the side of the bed. "Nothing about this is right. Nothing. I shouldn't have said yes to James, I should have told you about us sooner, you should have told me about everything you feel sooner, God, I shou- I should have just told you from the beginning…"

"Yes, yes, all that we should have done and didn't do." He sighed, lightly swinging his legs over the side of the bed and grabbing for a pair of sweat pants as Cuddy started looking around for the few articles of clothing that she had discarded in his room. She suddenly felt very exposed and was, at that point, simply groping around for anything that she could put on to cover up.

House looked over at her sadly and tossed her a very nearly clean shirt that happened to be lying nearby, and she looked up at him with a sadness he'd never seen in her before. "Thank you."

"Of course." He nodded gruffly, grabbing another shirt for himself and sliding it on. "Can I say anything? Anything but I'm sorry? I can't say I would take it back… Because I wouldn't."

"Look, Gre-House, just stop."

He sighed again and sat down on the bed, looking towards the window and away from her. The thoughts of all the terrible possibilities that could come from this not so great meeting ran through his head. What would his best friend do? What would Cuddy do? Would she stay with him, pretend none of this had ever happened? No, of course she wouldn't, Cuddy wasn't like that. But, for years she'd wanted a family of her own… Maybe she'd do anything to get it, including lie and hide how she and House felt.

"What are you going to do?" He asked quietly, still unable to bring himself to face her.

Cuddy sat on the opposite side of the bed in a position that almost mirrored House's and sighed lightly. "I don't know."

"Not even a small idea?"

"Unfortunately not. I can't do anything. I can't be with him after this, obviously."

This sparked House's interest. Sure it was selfish, but her not being with Wilson was definitely a step towards her being with him, and after all of these years of holding it inside he was finally admitting to himself and to her that that was all he ever really wanted.

The small woman placed her head in her hands and whimpered softly. "I can't be with you, either. I've ruined everything."

"No- Cuddy, bu- No you haven't. You can have whoever you want… You just have to explain it to the other unfortunate guy with a little… or a lot of understanding. Crying would probably help too."

"Don't House." She growled, quickly lifting her head and giving him a sharp glare over her shoulder. "You only say that because you're so sure that I'm going to run to James and tell him that, 'I'm really sorry, but I love House way more than you'."

House shrugged and stood up. "You can tell me the same thing. You've left me before."

Cuddy quickly rose and turned to face him before making her way to the living room to retrieve her clothes. "Don't even bring that up House, it isn't about that."

"Well it's true." He replied, following her out. "You have."

"I was a kid, God dammit. Don't bring that up in hopes of making me feel worse about how this is going, I already feel terrible and I don't need the added guilt from you."

"I'm not trying to make you feel worse." House said quietly as he watched her slide her skirt up over her toned legs and tear off his shirt when she picked up her own blouse. "I'm just letting you know I have no expectations."

"And lying to me after making me feel worse is really not helping your case."

"You make it sound like this is some contest one of us is going to win. 'Who was nicer to me today, House or Wilson. I really have to think about that'."

She shot him another glare as she buttoned up her shirt and grabbed up her bag. "Just shut up House."

"Where are you going?"

"Home."

"Wait, it's like, one in the morning, stay here."

She scoffed sadly and turned away from him, "I don't think that's a good idea, House."

"I think you're out of good ideas, Cuddy."

She nodded sadly and made her way to the door. "We'll talk."

"We'll have to."

"I'll… come by after work tomorrow."

House nodded grimly, knowing that any verdict delivered that quickly was not going to be a good one, but he gave her a half hearted wave anyway as she slipped out the door and, most assuredly, out of his grasp again.

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A/N: OH MY GOSH. I am so sorry I have not been updating, I have been working on Risky Business/School/not dying. I am sooooooooooooo sorry and I will try to make it up to any of you who will still read this. :[


	8. Big Hearts Are For Breaking

**Borderline**

Chapter Eight: Big Hearts Are For Breaking

**Months Ago…**

She pulled out of the soft lip lock that they had found themselves in, a tiny smile on her face as her hazy eyes focused up on him. It was Tuesday, and they always ha lunch together on Tuesdays, but as of late they'd been focusing less and less on where to go to fill their stomachs as they found themselves engrossed in each other.

And he, of course, grinned back at her. How could he not? She was stunning. Radiant. Near perfect. He couldn't even help himself anymore when it came to her, and no one seemed to mind. "I feel like I've been with you forever, but-"

"Only a few hours at the same time?" It was her turn to grin, her lips gliding over her perfect and likely costly teeth. "I know."

His voice was barely a whisper as he wrapped his arm around her and nuzzled her ear softly. "It's a good thing."

Her smile faded softly as she thought about this, but he couldn't see, so she nodded softly to agree with him. "It's going to change everything."

**Now…**

House couldn't take it. He hadn't spoken to Wilson in weeks, and as much as he hated him at the moment, it was killing him. It hurt almost as much as knowing Cuddy was with him, and NOTHING hurt more than knowing they had gone behind his back, knowing full well how he felt. What kind of friends did he have, anyway?

He sighed angrily. Friends he deserved.

"Alright, fuck it."

He hopped up from where he sat on the couch, where he had been since Cuddy ran out nearly an hour go. He grabbed his cane and motorcycle keys and made his way out the door.

Wilson opened the door, bleary eyed and very confused by House's sudden, unexpected presence on his doorstep at two in the morning. "House?"

"Well it's certainly not Cuddy," House said icily, giving Wilson a glare as he pushed passed him into the apartment. "Though I'm sure you'd rather have her come barging in at two in the morning. Especially if she was naked."

"Look, House… Can we talk about this? I know you're upset but-"

"You know I'm upset?!" He cried, throwing his cane hard on the ground. "What in the fuck is wrong with you, you fucking asshole!"

"What's wrong with me?" Wilson retaliated, suddenly awake and on the defensive. "What's wrong with you? Why didn't you ever ask her out?"

"Because I'm a moron. A fucking idiot." House seethed. "Nothing compared to a douche bag who obviously has no respect for his 'best friend'. Do you really expect me to think it's ok? Do you? You're a prick. You aren't even half the man you pretend to be, and the man you pretend to be may as well have one ball. You couldn't even tell me yourself, you couldn't tell me on your first date, first kiss, first fuck. I, I the great ass, the menace of New Jersey, and, according to you, a great big dick, would never, EVER have done that to you. Never. I couldn't."

Wilson looked towards the ground, sighing softly and putting his hands on his hips. "I'm sorry, House-"

"Oh well, gee thank you, Wilson. I feel great now. Thank you so much for the apology. I'm no longer hurt or betrayed."

"Stop being sarcastic," Wilson growled. "If you want to talk about this talk about it like a grown up."

House looked at him with more anger than he had ever allowed himself to feel. "I don't want to talk."

"Well then what do you want?"

"I want to kick your ass."

And before he knew what was going on Wilson was on the floor, shocked by the stinging sensation that was quickly starting to burn through his face. It didn't stop there though, as House quickly pulled the smaller man to his feet and hit him again. "Fuck you, Wilson. Fuck you. You couldn't stop to think about me? You couldn't even stop to think that maybe House will be upset that I'm doing the only woman he's ever really wanted? I wonder if he'll mind that I've COMPLETELY ruined our friendship. Did you not consider any of that?"

Wilson gasped quickly, trying his best to get his wind back. "House, it doesn't have to be ruined-"

House hit him again, and Wilson snapped. He pushed his… friend up against a wall and yelled, "And when have you ever thought about me? About how you affect me? About your addiction and how maybe you aren't the only one who suffers because of it?"

"I think about it all the time."

"Did you think about it when you called Amber and had her come get you because you were so God damned miserable that you couldn't even stop yourself from drinking yourself into an oblivion?"

"I didn't-"

"When have you ever thought about anyone but you? You're here tonight because of you! Did you ever think about Cuddy? Think she fucking likes all of your shit? Think she likes how many times you've broken her heart?"

House pushed him down and took another swing at him, barely grazing Wilson's shoulder this time.

"Of course I do. Think I'm miserable for no reason?"

"You're just as much an asshole as I am."

"I'm not a back stabber though. Or a liar. Or a pussy. All of which you are."

"Fuck, House." Wilson sighed, suddenly weary. He slid down to the ground against the wall and pressed his hands to his eyes. "God, fuck. I-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Tears stung at House's eyes and he dared not look down at the man that he once called his best friend for fear that they might overflow. Instead he took a deep breath, picked up his cane and made his way to the door.

"I'll never forgive you, you know."

"I'm sor-"

"I'm leaving."

And he left him there, blood rushing from his mouth as he tried to make the situation ok in his mind, to prove to himself that he wasn't an asshole.

Of course, some things can't be twisted just because you'd like them to be.

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A/N: That was disgustingly easy to write. God. Wilson is such an asshole.


	9. You’re Gonna Miss Me When I’m Gone

**Borderline**

Chapter Nine: You're Gonna Miss Me When I'm Gone

It really was too bad that Cuddy was rather typically right. She had been right about everything the past few weeks, hell months. Everything had changed. She had been stupid in being with Wilson, and even more moronic in sleeping with House. She'd hurt everyone she cared about, or she was well on her way to doing so.

Of course, she couldn't have even fathomed the sight that would weakly wander into her office that next day.

"Oh my God, James! What happened to you?" She was quickly on her feet, rushing to Wilson's side as he timidly dragged himself in, checking him over quickly but thoroughly. "Where'd you go last night? What happened?"

"I didn't go anywhere." He sighed, lightly grabbing her wrists and pulling them away from his face. "Where-"

Wilson's words hither quickly and her eyes narrowed, completely understanding what he meant. "Oh. Oh, no."

"Lisa, look, don't-"

But it was too late. Cuddy was already on a mission, and she marched passed Wilson and towards the elevators so that she could confront that son of a bitch. Wilson wasn't far behind, quickly catching up to her and trying all along the trip up to House's office to explain to the crazed woman that this was a matter that the two men needed to settle and she needed not get involved in.

"No. This is ridiculous. It's going to all end now."

She walked into his office, steam very nearly pouring out of her ears, only to meet a roomful of boxes. Stopping short, a confused look spread across her features and Wilson joined her at her side, looking equally as out of the loop. "House?"

"What?" A growl came from behind a rather obscene stack of moving boxes on top of his desk. A hand peaked through a crack between them and shoved them off and tumbling to the ground. Apparently they hadn't been filled yet, or House was really just that upset. "I'm obviously busy."

"I don't care." Cuddy's voice dripped with anger, and if that wasn't enough to scare House to death, her icy glare should have been. "We're going to talk."

"Oh, finally?" He sneered, obviously unimpressed by her anger and firing back with equal force. "Interesting. Get the fuck out Wilson."

"Anything you have to say to her about this I deserve to hear."

"Then neither of you gets my time." He scoffed softly and stood up to grab some books off of his shelf and pack them away in a box.

"House, stop-"

"Leave, James."

Wilson stepped back slowly, now totally confused. Cuddy turned to face him and snapped, "It isn't a request."

"Fine." He sighed, throwing his hands in the air and heading for the door, muttering the whole way, "Cause it isn't my problem or anything."

As soon as he was gone House dropped a box of books on the floor, and the thunderous boom echoed throughout the office. "What do you want? You here to tell me, "Sorry, House, I'm gonna go with Wilson?'"

"No." Her voice was dangerously low as she crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm here to say that you are an asshole. And that you had NO business in doing that to James. Who do you think you are, Jean-Claude Van Damme? This isn't a situation that required violence, House."

"You're absolutely right, Cuddy." He nodded and dropped another full box on the ground. "It just needed action. I took action with him, now I'll take it with you."

"You going to give me a shiner too? I have the feeling I could take you."

House smirked and grabbed a small box off of his desk, "I couldn't hit you. But I can leave you."

He switched the box to underneath his arm and hobbled towards her, "Since you couldn't make up your mind, I will. And I quit. For good this time. I'm done, I'm leaving today. You have a good team here, they'll run things smoothly. You can marry Wilson and have delightfully Jewish children and I am not going to be around wasting my life in a department that doesn't technically exist. So long Cuddy."

Cuddy's glare quickly melted and she dropped her arms to her sides. Leaving? He wasn't leaving. The hospital needed him, she needed him.

"Too much for you to handle? Sorry about that. Either help me pack or leave."

"House, I-" She really did need him, didn't she? She suddenly realized how selfish she had been, and how just as House had taken her for granted that she had done the exact same thing. He'd always be there, or so she thought. Through thick and thin, whenever she needed him she knew he'd be there, and now he was going to take that from her. "House please don't go-"

"I can't just stay here!" He exclaimed, suddenly frustrated and looking far angrier than she'd ever seen him before. "Even if you leave him. What are you going to do? Be with me? Be with neither of us? I can't ever have a normal relationship with him again. I can't ever have a normal relationship with you. We're all fucked. You fucked us up, Cuddy. You did, Wilson did and I did. We're all idiots, and now I'm going to do my part to fix it so we all can move on. At least you still have him, and that's good enough. He's a… decent guy, and he deserves someone like you."

Cuddy slipped over to his desk, reaching out and laying a hand on his shoulder softly. "House, really, don't go. Please… I'm… I'm sorry, I know I messed up. I know what I did was absolutely stupid. I took you for granted, too."

"I know. You thought I'd always be here. If I couldn't be with you at least I'd be in your life here, right?"

"Exactly." She whispered, sliding a hand up to gently touch his cheek. "House please don't leave."

"I have to, Cuddy. I can't stay here."

"I'm not going to stay with James-"

"Great. What incentive. Then he'll hate me. Not that it matters, since I hate him, but we couldn't work together."

"Yes you could, you don't hate each other."

"On the contrary…" He sighed softly and gently pushed her hand away from him. "We will. Don't make this any more difficult. I don't want to stay. I can't work for you anymore."

Cuddy stepped back slowly, tears forming in her eyes. "You're an asshole. You did exactly what you said you weren't going to do. 'I'm not going to run, Cuddy. You aren't a game'. And here you are, running."

He sighed again and plopped into his chair. "I'm not running. I'm removing myself from a harmful situation for all three of us. It's just what needs to be done. I still want you, I still love you, and if you came with me I'd like it. However I'm not going to force you, nor will I beg. You know what I want, I know what I want, and I know what we need. We both need me to leave, cause it's me or Wilson, and he doesn't know what's going on, so there's no way that he's out of here."

"House…" She looked at the ground and quickly wiped at her eyes before nodding. "If that's what you want."

"It's not. I'm doing it anyway." House looked at his hands that he had neatly folded in his lap. "I'll… keep in touch."

"No you won't."

"You're right. You'll keep in touch."

"Yeah. I will."

He ran a hand through his hair and looked up at her, wanting nothing more than to scoop her up and kiss her, to make her feel whole again, but he knew what he was doing, and he knew that no matter what he needed to leave it all behind. "You need to go talk to Wilson."

"I know." She whispered, her voice hushed so that she wouldn't start crying.

"I'll be here… all day, I guess. You can... come say goodbye later."

Cuddy shook her head and turned for the door, making her way out without a word, without a goodbye. She wasn't ready to say it, not to either of them.

Unfortunately that was how it was going to have to end.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

A/N: Peace out House. You made the right choice.


	10. When It's Over

**Borderline**

Chapter Ten: When It's Over

Cuddy walked out of House's office completely defeated, knowing that he was right and she had ruined everything between the three of them. Now she had to face James. She still didn't know how she'd be able to, not now. But of course it was only fair, not that anything up until then really had been fair to any of them.

She slipped out of the office and nearly ran straight into her boyfriend, fiancé, soon to be ex and nearly jumped out of her skin. "God, James why are you out here? I-I thought you went back to your office…"

"No I was here, waiting for you so that you could explain what in the hell is going on. Why is House acting this way?"

"He's hurt-"

"Well clearly!"

"Hey, don't. Don't have an attitude right now, please, James." She tried and failed to glare at him, so instead she resigned herself to a soft sigh and rested her head in her hand. "Can we go talk in your office?"

Wilson looked at her sadly, knowing full well that this wasn't going to end in his favor. He nodded anyway and slipped his hand to her back, slowly leading her the few steps to privacy.

"So…" He asked again, once in the sanctity of his closed in office. "What's going on?"

"House is leaving."

"You mean he's threatening to leave again?"

"No. He's done. He's not coming back."

"Is… is it because of me?"

Cuddy nodded slowly, averting her watering eyes to the ground. "Yes. And me. He's… hurt. He's upset. He's angry and he doesn't think he can forgive us."

Wilson sighed and stepped over to the couch, motioning for Cuddy to follow him, and he settled into the thick leather cushions heavily. She nearly didn't follow, but upon seeing the pain on his features her guilt dragged her over and positioned her on the opposite end of the couch, much to his dismay. He shook his head softly, trying to shake the nagging voice in the back of his mind telling him everything was over. "We really should have thought about this a long time ago."

"You should have said something to him. You're his best friend."

"You could have said something. It's not like I'm his only friend."

"James, this just never should have happened. The three of us were fine before. Not great, but we were fine. Now he's not even going to involve us in his life, he'll never forgive us!"

"Look, Lisa…" Wilson turned and softly touched her cheek. "It will work out. He'll get use to it, and he'll come back. He cares about us, much as he hates admitting it."

"James…" She sighed, turning away from him in attempt to hide the tears building up again in her eyes. "He won't come back. Trust me."

Wilson pulled away from her slowly and studied her, wondering why she seemed so different today. "What's-"

"Hasn't it bothered you? Him ignoring you? Do you not care? Why haven't you sought him out and spoken to him?"

"B-because I, I figured he was-"

"Upset?"

"Yes."

She stood to her feet and began pacing slowly. "You should have talked to him. Maybe.. maybe he wouldn't be leaving."

"You seem to adamantly believe he would have left and that he will be gone for good no matter what. Why? What happened?"

"Nothing." She said quickly. Too quickly. "Nothing. Just… I… Nothing happened. He just… He's been trying to tell me how he felt and I haven't been giving it the appropriate attention."

"He talked to you about us?"

She nodded, hoping not to go into further detail about the matter. "Yes."

"Did he talk to you… last night?"

She nodded again, "Yes we spoke last night. He was extremely unhappy. I had no idea that he'd.. Go and do that to you…"

"Do… Do you think I should talk to him still?"

"Yes! For the love of God at least apologize!"

"I did! I did last night! I tried to talk to him-"

"Maybe you should try to do it in a more civilized manner next time." She snapped, giving him a quick glare.

"Oh, now the fight is my fault?"

"No…" She replied quickly, returning to her seat next to him. I'm sorry I just… I don't want him to leave."

"I don't either…" He said quietly, slipping a hand into her hair and pulling her close to him. "I'm sorry, Lisa… I'll go talk to him. I want things to be ok as much as you do…"

He leaned in slowly to place a soft kiss on her lips, but she turned and allowed his lips to graze her cheek. Confused, he pulled back and gave her another quizzical stare. "Lisa…? Are you going to be ok?"

She shook her head sadly and looked down at her hands. "I… I can't… I can't talk about this here…"

"Well where do you want to go? What do we need to talk about? I- Do you want me to go talk to him now? What? Tell me what to do."

"Go talk to him." Cuddy sighed, her voice hushed as she crossed her arms over her chest and looked at the floor as though it could save her from this awful situation, though she knew that only a miracle could at this point. "You can come by later. We'll finish this. Later. I… I have things to do. Excuse me."

And she left him standing there, stunned, baffled and disheartened as she continued on her descent down to her office and her own thoughts on how to go about ending things between the two men in her life.

* * *

A/N: God, please forgive me for my failure in the updates. I've had a harsh month. I'll update more frequently after Nov. 13th.


	11. I Kinda Thought That You Should

**Borderline**

Chapter Eleven: I Kinda Thought That You Should

With a slower stride than usual, Wilson made the surprisingly lengthy trip into House's office to confront his friend in an effort to convince him that leaving wasn't the best option for him. He let himself in after lightly tapping on the glass door that separated the two of them and stood face to face with his best friend.

"House I..." He started before clearing his throat, feeling unreasonably nervous for someone who was innocent in this situation. "House, I don't think you should leave."

House returned his gaze with a glare that could shatter hearts and make small children cry, not in the least sympathetic to the man who was sleeping with the woman HE was in love with. "Wilson, I don't care."

"Fine, don't care what I think. I just, I don't want you to go. I'll miss you. You're my-"

"No I'm not." He stood to his feet quickly, limping around his desk and towards the other man who was now trembling with nerves, sadness and a sick feeling in his stomach. "I'm not your God damned best friend. If I were you would have given a shit about me, you would have TALKED to me like a fucking best friend and grown ass man would have. Don't bull shit me, and stop making me repeat myself. I'm leaving, and nothing Cuddy does can make me stay here."

"Well I'm not Cuddy."

"Well you aren't here of your own volition either, are you, pretty boy?"

Wilson glared back at him and stepped forward as if to physically confront House, and to his dismay House didn't skip a beat with returning the initiating step.

"What can I do, House? How can I fix this?"

"What don't you fucking get?!" He spat, eyebrows furrowing as he blinked back tears. "You can't fix this. You have beyond broken this. Even if you dump her, we can't be friends because we'll all be awkwardly aware of how it was my fault. I can't be with her. I want to be. I can't."

"We can work it out-"

House stopped him with a wave of his hand. "She hasn't told you, has she?"

"T-told me what?" God, if nerves hadn't already consumed him, by now fear surely would. What had Cuddy done? Why did House know about it- Oh. Oh fuck. Oh Jesus, no…

"You aren't going to be able to stay here." He mumbled, retreating back from his desk. "We're all out of here. You watch… You see what you did."

"You… You're a prick, House. Why can't you just let me be-"

"Happy? Cause you took the one person that could make me happy, that's why."

"Fuck you." Wilson whispered, wiping at his eyes before any real tears could escape them. "Go. Get the hell out of here. I'm glad you're going."

"I'm not, I have no other options."

"You could have dealt with it like an adult!"

"You could have stopped it before it started!"

He was visibly shaking now, every thing inside him was coiling up and ready to spring out at any moment. He knew he had to leave. He had to get away from House, if he didn't he was sure he'd kill him… Or he'd die trying.

"I never want to hear from you again." He choked out, backing towards the door so that he could run down and figure out if his deepest fears had any merit.

"Good. I don't plan on keeping in touch, buddy."

"This wasn't fair, House."

"Oh, I am WELL aware, prick."

With one last angry, remorseful glare Wilson turned and sped out, unable to be around his former friend for a second longer. Everything told him that his feelings were true, House had slept with Cuddy. Cuddy was going to leave him. He, too, was going to have to leave and escape from the memories that were bound to invoke so much pain within him and, for the first time, he really did feel what House was feeling. The pang inside his heart was more than just the heartbreak he was going to receive from Cuddy, but one of guilt, and of remorse for what he had done to his very best friend.

* * *

A/N: This one is WAY short, I know and I'm sorry, but I tried to make it full of emotion to make up for it. :[ Next one will be longer.


	12. Well I'll Be On My Way

**Borderline**

Chapter Twelve: Well I'll Be On My Way

Bursting into her office without notice or pleasant greeting, Wilson looked around Cuddy's office until his eyes fell on the defeated looking dean, very nearly curled up in her arm chair near the door. His gaze and heart softened momentarily as he looked upon her miserable form, growing cold again only upon remembering that her present state was partly her own fault.

"Just… Tell me honestly." He licked at his lips softly with a look of anticipation in his eyes. At least he hoped it was anticipation, rater than anxiousness, which is what he really felt. "Did… Did you sleep with House?"

His heart sank as Cuddy looked down at her lap, then at the wall, anywhere but his eyes. When she finally looked at him both of their eyes were watering.

"James, I'm-"

"No… No, I'm, I'm sorry. I knew. I knew all along how you both felt about each other. I was stupid for thinking I could come between that, that you could feel the way you felt for him, but for me."

She quickly got to her feet as he slowly backed towards the door, "No James, please, let me explain."

"Lisa… It's… It's not ok… But I understand, I think." He looked at the floor as he rubbed at his eyes, trying to stop them from dripping as he thought about how he had lost the two people he was closest to in such a short amount of time. "I guess this is us breaking up?"

Cuddy bit her bottom lip nervously, trying her best not to cry as well. "James, can we talk about this at home?"

"Why? House is upstairs packing up his things. He's leaving, right now. Why should I wait around when I'm going to just be packing up my things, too?"

"I do love you, James, I just-"

"I know, Lisa. I know you do, I believe you… But you'll never love me like you loved him. Like you love him." He sighed softly and ran a hand through his hair. "I… I'm going to turn in my two weeks notice in the morning. I'd uh… I'd like to take a half-day, so I can go home and… ponder."

A look of hurt crossed her face as he spoke. Both of her friends were leaving her? In the same day? She then realized that, as the tears finally couldn't be held back, that it was in fact her fault.

"Okay." She choked out, her voice cracking from the weight of her tears. "I'm so sorry, James."

He nodded and inched back to the door, "Me too."

* * *

A month later almost all the buzz about PPTH had all but died down. There had been numerous rumors circulating about why the head of Oncology was gone, why there was no longer a diagnostics department, and why House and Wilson had both mysteriously up and left so close together. As imaginable few of these rumors had any logical base, but a few of them were on the right track, and those few avoided Cuddy like the plague.

As for the Dean of Medicine, she continued doing her best to keep her hospital running smoothly, a task that was much easier without House around to distract her or ruin any of her plans. She missed it, though, the flirtatious banner, the almost loving teasing, and the ultimate rejection on both their parts. No one kept her on her toes anymore, and she was almost bored with her job. Even more saddening to her was that she had no one to share in her grief with, as she had no one to go home to spill her heart to, someone who knew House almost better than he knew himself. And she cried herself to sleep every night after tucking in her daughter, and now the only light in her life, thinking about how badly she had messed everything up in her life.

She wasn't the only one feeling down on themselves, though. In New York, Wilson found himself in a similar situation, constantly blaming himself for the 'break up' with his best friend, and the loss of his love. His new job provided him little joy and little fun, since his friend was not there to constantly badger him and con him into buying him useless things. Even with the added money to his bank account, Wilson wasn't satisfied with his life, or anything in it.

Lastly was House, who carried on as he usually did, drowning his sorrows in a bottle of pills or liquor. He would never admit it, but he missed his friends and job more than he could ever imagine. Emptiness couldn't even begin to describe how he felt about his life, because he had felt empty for so long anyway, but this took everything to a new level. He didn't know how much more he could take before he went crawling back to the both of them, but his stubbornness wouldn't allow him to admit this to himself.

And as the months went on and the former friends continued living their shells of lives they each wondered what they could of done, and how it could have ended differently. They all hoped, individually, that one of the others would contact them, call them, come after them or come back, but none of them could bring themselves to do the deed due to either their pride, their shame or their heartache.

So it went that that was the end of what once was a tight bond of three friends, now separated by more than miles, but rather by the distance of their shut up hearts.

* * *

A/N: OMG. I'm sorry sorry sorry sorrrrrrry for the wait, ANYWAY. The End. I hope you liked it even though it was SAD! :[


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